• Released on friday 27/08/10
  • Illustrator: Madchewi
  • Rare Card Available at the Shop
  • You don't have this character in your collection.
  • icon
  • Browse 15 Market offers

Power of Ray:

Revenge: Attack +8

If a character belonging to the same team as Ray loses a round, in the next round the Attack of Ray will be increased to 8


Bonus :

Damage +2

La Junta’s Damage points are increased by 2 points. (Remember: Damage points are inflicted on your opponent if you win the round)

First evolution of the 4 different evolutions of this character :

  • La JuntaRaypicture
    Power5AbilityUnlock ability at
    Damage1BonusDamage +2
  • La JuntaRaypicture
    Power5AbilityUnlock ability at
    Damage5BonusDamage +2
  • La JuntaRaypicture
    Power6AbilityUnlock ability at
    Damage6BonusDamage +2
  • La JuntaRaypicture
    Power8AbilityRevenge: Attack +8
    Damage6BonusDamage +2
63 characters
missions icon 23 missions
Bonus Damage +2
These light-hearted, loudmouthed fighters are as nimble in their actions as they are in their wisecracks. As supporters of a strong regime, these soldiers have decided to bring society into line, starting by shaving the heads of the wimpy youth. In the long term, they’d be more than happy to take over the running of the government from those “bunch of morons”.
  • At level 2: min 18 681 Clintz
  • At level 3: min 15 948 Clintz
  • At level 4: min 16 683 Clintz
  • At level 5: min 16 211 Clintz
Browse 15 Market offers

49 comments on Ray

Friday 27/08/2010, 16:44

Ray - 8/6 with Revenge: attack +8 (ability) and +2 damage (bonus)

- A solid power of 8, always welcomed in the La Junta clan.
- Basically 8 damage (10 with fury) that allows 2HKO with even La Junta's 2*, like Dean and Wardog.
- Ray has the potential of a nice +8 attack manipulation. nothing to sneeze about.
- When hit by SoA, Ray is a solid 8/8. When hit by SoB, he is an 8/6 with his attack manipulation. AKA: He's solid
- Since Ray doesn't need his ability to fight, the fact that it is revenge will allow some mindgames against the opponent. (Basically, your opponent thinks you'll only play Ray after a loss. you play him after a win/whatever. *insert surprised opponent face* )
- Ray counted to infinity, twice.

- He is 5*, which takes up a lot of room.
- His ability is revenge related. While he doesn't need his ability to fight at all, having it always helps.

Overall: 9/10. I like Emeth more than Ray (+20 attack is +20 attack) in mono La Junta (and possibly half, but maybe not) but Emeth has the ELO potential of being banned a lot. Ray has competition though. Naginata has solid pill manipulation with solid power. Why ue Ray over her though? That extra 1 damage allows your beautiful 2HKOs with your 2* and cards from other clans that Naginata can't do. While he's not a better card than her (it's opinion and player style), Ray is still a very solid card that can lead you to victory smiley

Friday 27/08/2010, 16:24

I never understood the chuck norris jokes... why Chuck Norris? why not Sylvester Stallone or Arnold? I'll tell you why, because "Chuck Norris can make Newtons apple fall UP..." now you maybe asking yourself why am I talking about Chuck norris well Ray's bio claims he is Chuck Norris... Whatevs let's just get into this review.

Stats at 5*: 8/6 revenge: +8atk

How intimidating! 8/8 w/b +8atk w/ra and even without the bonus or ability stands at a half decent 8/6. Like Slify will always say he is situational and this is true. Chuck norris (Ray) does kind of need his ability for the perfect nuke but even without it can be seen as better when put against UX52 or Lou (however both have SOA).

Despite my lies SOA or SOB doesn't cramp his style and almost has immunity vs them unlike his fellow comrades.

His 8 damage w/b can pair up with almost all the cards in the La Junta ranks (curse you Thormund!!!).
So is he perfect/chuck norris? Well almost. While he replaces the forever banned emeth you might be tripping over yourself activating the revenge (and La Junta haven't got an Arno for blocking...). However you could go without it but vs meta-game 5* he might get beaten pill for pill (e.g Askai, Stanly, Ongh, Oshitsune wins pill for pill)

As for competition?
Emeth is still there but he is banned (possibly forever) so he will take over the mono deck.
Naginata might have a spot for the half deck but as someone said both of the cards have different playstyles.

Chuck Norris or not, I'm not completely sold yet. Nonetheless anything that can match pill for pill against Dj Korr is good in my books smiley

replaces emeth

Make sure you rate smiley above Slify smiley

For a full review make sure you check out http://www.youtube.com/user/UrbanRivalsNews on the 7th edition of UR talk with co-host Slify and guest co-host Bojax.

and remember smiley

Saturday 28/08/2010, 17:23

Chuck Norris can taste lies.

Chuck Norris crossed the road. No one has ever dared question his motive.

"Chuck Norris" used to be the master password for Facebook mods when checking accounts. This is an actual fact. Yes, i'm being dead serious.

Chuck Norris can strangle you with a cordless phone.

Ghosts are actually caused by Chuck Norris killing people faster than Death can process them.

When Chuck Norris looks in a mirror, the mirror shaters, because even a mirror isn't stupid enough to get between Chuck Norris and Chuck Norris.

The last didgit of pi is Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris is the end of all things.

If you spell Chuck Norris wrong on google, it doesn't say, "Did you mean Chuck Norris?" It simpily says, "run while you still have the chance."

In the average living room, there are1,242 objects Chuck Norris can kill you with, including the room itself.

Chuck Norris deystroyed the periodic table because Chuck Norris only recognizes the element of surprise.

Chuck Norris didn't wet the bed as a child. The bed wet itself out of fear.

If you have five dollars, and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more than you.

Once upon a time, there was a magical kingdom. Then Chuck Norris came along, and it wasn't so magical.

Chuck Norris constantly donates blood to the Red Cross. just never his own.

Chuck Norris controls all five lions of Voltron stimultaneously.

Hope you enjoy the Chuck Norris jokes!

Tuesday 31/08/2010, 12:58

As a handicap to all others, he has agreed to limit the use of his legs and fist, using only weapons to fight. HIs original ability was:

- Defeat: Victory

Sunday 19/09/2010, 23:04

I'm seeing all of these posts making the connection to Chuck Norris through the bio or art, a much simpler way is if you know that Chuck Norris is a screen name, his real name is Carlos Ray, hence this character being called "Ray" nice one UR, I'm just a little surprised that nobody mentioned this before me

Wednesday 08/09/2010, 19:42

Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked someone so hard that his foot broke the speed of light, went back in time, and killed Amelia Earhart while she was flying over the Pacific Ocean.

Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.

Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.

MacGyver can build an airplane out of Gum and paper clips, but Chuck Norris can kill him and take it.

Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.

Chuck Norris appeared in the "Street Fighter II" video game, but was removed by Beta Testers because every button caused him to do a roundhouse kick. When asked bout this "glitch," Norris replied, "That's no glitch."

Chuck Norris built a time machine and went back in time to stop the JFK assassination. As Oswald shot, Chuck met all three bullets with his beard, deflecting them. JFK's head exploded out of sheer amazement.

The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain

Chuck Norris played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won.

Chuck Norris can divide by zero.

Darkness is not the absence of light. It is the presence of Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris has two speeds: walk and kill.

Chuck Norris CAN believe it's not butter

Chuck Norris talks about Fight Club.

Chuck Norris knows where the Beef is.

Chuck Norris knows what Willis is talkin' about.

Chuck Norris created a circle with corners.

Chuck Norris defines love as the reluctance to murder. If you're still alive, it's because Chuck Norris loves you.

Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.

I really didn't mean to post that many smiley

Friday 03/12/2010, 06:37

I think this card should have been 8/8 in the La Junta and the ability would be defeat:-12 life min. 0

Sunday 29/08/2010, 22:01

Chuck Norris is a rare card, Lyse Teria Cr is a Collector. Chuck Norris is more valuable.

Green Face.smiley

Wednesday 06/07/2011, 06:08

when Alexander Graham Bell invented the telephone he already had two missed calls from Chuck Norris

Even goldfish never forget Chuck Norris

When Chuck Norris looks in the mirror he gets jealous

Chuck Norris can dislike on Facebook

Chuck Norris won the World Series of Poker using Pokemon cards

Chuck Norris died 20 years ago, Death just hasn't built up the courage to tell him yet

Death once had a near-Chuck Norris experience

Chuck Norris can draw a perfect circle with a ruler

Chuck Norris pities mr. T

you know you love Chuck Norris facts

Saturday 07/07/2012, 21:42

Chuck Norris is the father of God.

Microsoft pays for Chuck Norris' Xbox Live account

Why would Chuck Norris want to be president when he rules the universe.

Chuck Norris makes onions cry.

Chuck Norris tells his GPS when he wants to turn.

Chuck Norris was in the original cast of Texas Chainsaw Massacre but left because he didn't understand why he needed a chainsaw for the 'effects'.

Chuck Norris once blew his nose into a piece of paper. Today those papers are known as 100 dollar bills.

Chuck Norris doesn't buy petrol because his car is too scared to break down.

Chuck Norris tells signs what to do.

They say "Walker, Texas Ranger" was at first made to be a reality show.

Chuck Norris finished Minecraft.

Chuck Norris can light the contents of the Windows recycle bin on fire.

Chuck Norris once won a staredown over a Walkie talkie.

Many people earned the title of bad-ass, unfortunately bad-ass didn't earn the title of Chuck-Norris.

When Chuck Norris was a kid, he was so talented, he won the school talent show by signing up.

Chuck Norris is so hard, he uses diamonds as stress balls.

Once the cop pulled over Chuck Norris....the cop was Lucky to leave with a warning.

Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack. His heart isn't nearly foolish enough to attack him.

Chuck Norris dosent have to shoot a gun, he just has to throw the bullet.

Fear of spiders is aracnaphobia, fear of tight spaces is chlaustraphobia, fear of Chuck Norris is called Logic.

Thats all for now smiley

Sunday 19/09/2010, 21:59

Chuck Norris once had a street named after him but they had to change it back shortly after because no one crosses Chuck Norris and lives.
Chuck Norris once roundhoused the Earth. The world hasn't stopped spinning since.
The meteor that killed the dinosuars was really Chuck Norris roundhouseing everything.
The giraffe is really a horse that crossed Chuck Norris's uppercut.
Chuck Norris gives Freddy nightmares.
Chuck Norris used molten lava as mouthwash.
A state trooper pulled Chuck Norris over the other day. Being a man who respects the law, Chuck let him off with a warning.
Chuck Norris won a game of Connect Four in three moves.
Chuck Norris inveted texting...While driving.
I am writing these Facts because Chuck Norris threatened to roundhouse kick me if i didn't.

Hope you enjoyed these Facts!

Monday 11/07/2011, 15:41

Random Fact: Chuck Norris's Middle Name is Ray which is the name of this Character

Saturday 03/03/2012, 21:49

Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.
Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting infers the probability of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.
If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death.
Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.
When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris built a time machine and went back in time to stop the JFK assassination. As Oswald shot, Chuck Norris met all three bullets with his beard, deflecting them. JFK's head exploded out of sheer amazement.
Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life there.
They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but it wouldn't take sh*t from anybody.
A blind man once stepped on Chuck Norris' shoe. Chuck replied, "Don't you know who I am? I'm Chuck Norris!" The mere mention of his name cured this man blindness. Sadly the first, last, and only thing this man ever saw, was a fatal roundhouse delivered by Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris is 1/8th Cherokee. This has nothing to do with ancestry, the man ate a f*cking Indian.

There is no chin behind Chuck Norris' beard. There is only another fist.

In fine print on the last page of the Guinness Book of World Records it notes that all world records are held by Chuck Norris, and those listed in the book are simply the closest anyone else has ever gotten.

The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.

Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.

The Great Wall of China was originally created to keep Chuck Norris out. It failed misserably.

Crop circles are Chuck Norris' way of telling the world that sometimes corn needs to lie the f*ck down.

Chuck Norris once commented, "There are few problems in this world that cannot be solved by a swift roundhouse kick to the face. In fact, there are none."

Chuck Norris once ate an entire ream of rice paper and shat out origami swans and Mister Miyagi from Karate Kid.

Chuck Norris is ten feet tall, weighs two-tons, breathes fire, and could eat a Hammer and take a shotgun blast standing.

Chuck Norris is a man of few words. Chuck Norris is not a man of few roundhouse kicks to the face.

The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse actually live in Chuck Norris's nutsack.

When observing a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick in slow motion, one finds that Chuck Norris actually rapes his victim in the ass, smokes a cigarette with Dennis Leary, and then roundhouse kicks them in the face.

Chuck Norris put humpty dumpty back together again, only to roundhouse kick him in the face. Later Chuck dined on scrambled eggs with all the king's horses and all the king's men. The king himself could not attend for unspecified reasons. Coincidentally, the autopsoy revealed the cause of death to be a roundhouse kick to the face. There is only one King.

When Chuck Norris played golf for money, chuck marked down a hole in 0 every time, a pro at the golf club, said to Chuck: "excuse me sir, but you cant score zero on a hole". Chuck Norris turned towards the man and said, im Chuck Norris, the man then proceeded to pour gas over his body and set himself on fire because that would be less painful than getting roundhouse kicked by Chuck Norris, Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked him in the face anyways.

Chuck Norris made Ellen Degeneres straight.

Chuck Norris kicked Neo out of Zion , now Neo is "The Two"

Chuck Norris' iPod came with a real charger instead of just a USB cord

Chuck Norris knows where Carmen Sandiego is.

Rudolph has a red nose because he got lippy and Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked him across the face several times

China was once bordering the United States, until Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked it all the way through the Earth.

Chuck Norris is what Willis was talking about

If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you.

Chuck Norris sent Jesus a birthday card on December 25th and it wasn't Jesus’ birthday. Jesus was to scared to correct Chuck Norris and to this day December 25th is known as Jesus' birthday.

When Chuck Norris had surgery, the anesthesia was applied to the doctors.

Chuck Norris once broke the land speed record on a bicycle that was missing its chain and the back tire.

Chuck Norris once kicked a baby elephant into puberty

Multiple people have died from Chuck Norris giving them the finger.

Chuck Norris once tried to wear glasses. The result was him seeing around the world to the point where he was looking at the back of his own head.

Pee Wee Herman got arrested for masturbating in public. The same day, Chuck Norris got an award for masturbating in public.

Once a grizzly bear threatened to eat Chuck Norris. Chuck showed the bear his fist and the bear proceeded to eat himself, because it would be the less painful way to die.

If Chuck Norris is late, time better slow the f*ck down

Chuck Norris sleeps with a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris

Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer.

Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.

Chuck Norris always has sex on the first date. Always.

A Handicap parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.

Chuck Norris frequently donates blood to the Red Cross. Just never his own.

There is no such thing as tornados. Chuck Norris just hates trailer parks.

Chuck Norris never cries, because of this when he's sad he roundhouse kicks himself and it makes him feel better since he knows he is the only one who can survive the roundhouse.

Chuck Norris does not procreate, he breeds

When asked what type of vehicle he drives, Chuck Norris responded slyly with "Don't you mean what kind of vehicle drives me?"

Chuck Norris' evil twin brother, Richard Simmons, once approached Chuck with the hope of reconciliation, but at the sight of Richard's curly, well kept hair, Chuck Norris became so enraged that he turned green with hate and ripped Richard Simmons arms and legs off. This action was the origin of the Marvel Comic badass, The Incredible Hulk.

Chuck Norris doesn't worry about changing his clock twice a year for daylight savings time. The sun rises and sets when Chuck tells it to.

Chuck Norris only masturbates to pictures of Chuck Norris.

Filming on location for Walker: Texas Ranger, Chuck Norris brought a stillborn baby lamb back to life by giving it a prolonged beard rub. Shortly after the farm animal sprang back to life and a crowd had gathered, Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked the animal, breaking its neck, to remind the crew once more that Chuck giveth, and the good Chuck, he taketh away.

Chuck Norris was the fourth Wiseman. He brought baby Jesus the gift of “beard”. Jesus wore it proudly to his dying day. The other Wisemen, jealous of Jesus’ obvious gift favoritism, used their combined influence to have Chuck omitted from the Bible. Shortly after all three died of roundhouse kick related deaths.

Chuck Norris used live ammunition during all shoot-outs. When a director once said he couldn’t, he replied, “Of course I can, I’m Chuck Norris,” and roundhouse kicked him in the face.

If paper beats rock, rock beats scissors, and scissors beats paper, what beats all 3 at the same time? Answer: Chuck Norris.

When his martial arts prowess fails to resolve a situation, Chuck Norris plays dead. When playing dead doesn’t work, he plays zombie.

Although it is not common knowledge, there are actually three sides to the Force: the light side, the dark side, and Chuck Norris.

Scientists used to believe that diamond was the world’s hardest substance. But then they met Chuck Norris, who gave them a roundhouse kick to the face so hard, and with so much heat and pressure, that the scientists turned into artificial Chuck Norris.

God offered Chuck Norris the gift to fly, which he swiftly declined for super strength roundhouse ability.

When Chuck Norris was denied a Bacon McMuffin at McDonalds because it was 10:35, he roundhouse kicked the store so hard it became a KFC.

Chuck Norris drinks napalm to quell his heartburn.

A duck’s quack does not echo. Chuck Norris is solely responsible for this phenomenon. When asked why he will simply stare at you, grimly.

Chuck Norris once tried to defeat Garry Kasparov in a game of chess. When Norris lost, he won in life by roundhouse kicking Kasparov in the side of the face.

Chuck Norris’ roundhouse kick is so powerful, it can be seen from outer space by the naked eye.

Chuck Norris doesn’t believe in Germany.

If you want a list of Chuck Norris’ enemies, just check the extinct species list.

Chuck Norris has never blinked in his entire life. Never.

Chuck Norris doesn’t need to swallow when eating food.

If Superman and The Flash were to race to the edge of space you know who would win? Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris eats transformer toys in vehicle mode and poos them out transformed into a robot.

Ironically, Chuck Norris’ hidden talent is invisibility.

Chuck Norris owns the greatest poker face of all-time. It helped him win the 1983 world series of poker despite him holding just a joker, a 2 of clubs, a 7 of spades, and a green number 4 from Uno and a monopoly ‘get out of jail free’ card.

Chuck Norris invented water.

Chuck Norris invented a language that incorporates karate and roundhouse kicks. So next time Chuck Norris is kicking your ass, Don’t be offended or hurt, he may be just trying to tell you he likes your hat.

Chuck Norris went looking for a bar but couldn’t find one. He walked to a vacant lot and sat there. Sure enough within an hour an a half someone constructed a bar around him. He then ordered a shot, drank it, and then burned the place to the ground. Chuck Norris yelled over the roar of the flames, “always leave things the way you found em!”

One time while sparring with Wolverine, Chuck Norris accidentally lost his left testicle. You might be familiar with it to this very day by its technical term: Jupiter.

Chuck Norris is Luke Skywalker’s real father.

Contrary to popular belief, Chuck Norris, not the box jellyfish of northern Australia, is the most venomous creature on earth. Within 3 minutes of being bitten, a human being experiences the following symptoms: fever, blurred vision, beard rash, tightness of the jeans, and the feeling of being repeatedly kicked through a car windshield.

Chuck Norris does not use spell check. If he happens to misspell a word, Oxford will simply change the actual spelling of it.

Before science was invented it was once believed that autumn occurred when Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked every tree in existence.

In the original pilot for Star Trek Next Generation, Chuck Norris can be seen powering the USS Enterprise warp drive with his roundhouse kicks.

Chuck Norris isn’t lactose intolerant. He just doesn’t put up with lactose’s sh*t.

Chuck Norris doesn’t eat. Rather he kicks ass until he’s full.

Scientists in Washington have recently conceded that, if there were a nuclear war, all that would remain are cockroaches and Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris once threated to Sue Burger King because they refused to make it his way. When asked what “his way” detailed, he replied: “with barbed wire and nails, of course”. He then roundhouse kicked the reporter for even asking.

Chuck Norris never “gets laid”, rather: “laid gets Chuck”.

Playgirl magazine once asked Chuck Norris to appear naked in an issue, Chuck laughed at the opporunity saying “there isn’t enough paper in the world to contain my bearded member”. He then killed the editors simply by unzipping his pants.

Helen Keller’s favorite color is Chuck Norris

Chuck Norris once walked down the street with a massive erection. There we no survivors.

When Chuck Norris’s wife burned the turkey one Thanksgiving, Chuck said, “Don’t worry about it honey,” and went into his backyard. He came back five minutes later with a live turkey, ate it whole, and when he threw it up a few seconds later it was fully cooked and came with cranberry sauce. When his wife asked him how he had done it, he gave her a roundhouse kick to the face and said, “Never question Chuck Norris.”

Chuck Norris doesnt have AIDS but he gives it to people anyway.

When you open a can of whoop-ass, Chuck Norris jumps out.

On June 7th 1994, Chuck Norris entered the same restaurant supermodel Cindy Crawford was eating at. Instinctively, Cindy swept everything off the table, threw herself on it in a fit of lust, and begged Chuck to ravish her. After Chuck finished his beer, he obliged her. When Chuck's magnificent lead sperm cannoned into Cindy's womb it went straight to one of her ovaries and roared, "Which one of you servile wenches thinks you can handle getting split
open by the Chuck!?" All of the eggs cowered in the corner. The same thing happened at the other ovary. "I didn't f*cking think so!" shouted the lead sperm which then lead the rest of the troops back into Chuck's balls. Chuck pulled out; roundhouse kicked Cindy in the face and told her, "Don't ever waste my time again."

Chuck Norris can piss into gale force winds.

There are no disabled people. Only people who have met Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris won 'Jumanji' without ever saying the word. He simply beat the living sh*t out of everything that was thrown at him, and the game forfeited.

Chuck Norris once bet NASA he could survive re-entry without a spacesuit. On July 19th, 1999, a naked Chuck Norris re-entered the earth's atmosphere, streaking over 14 states and reaching a temperature of 3000 degrees. An embarrassed NASA publicly claimed it was
a meteor, and still owes him a beer.

Chuck Norris got a perfect score on his SAT's, simply by writing Chuck Norris for every answer.

Aliens do exist. They're just waiting for Chuck Norris to die before they attack.

Chuck Norris once ate three 72 oz. steaks in one hour. He spent the first 45 minutes having sex with his waitress.

After much debate, President Truman decided to drop the atomic bomb on Hiroshima rather than the alternative of sending Chuck Norris. It was more "humane".

Chuck Norris doesn't see dead people. He makes people dead.

Chuck Norris once went to a frat party, and proceeded to roundhouse every popped collar in sight. He then trank three kegs and shat on their floor, just because he's Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris found out about Conan O'Brien's lever that shows clips from "Walker: Texas Ranger" and is working on a way to make it show clips of Norris having sex with Conan's wife.

Chuck Norris doesn't have normal white blood cells like you and I. His have a small black ring around them. This signifies that they are black belts in every form of martial arts and they roundhouse kick the sh*t out of viruses. That's why Chuck Norris never gets ill.

Chuck Norris's girlfriend once asked him how much wood a woodchuck could chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood. He then shouted, "HOW DARE YOU RHYME IN THE PRESENCE OF CHUCK NORRIS!" and ripped out her throat. Holding his girlfriend's bloody throat in his hand he bellowed, "Don't f*ck with Chuck!" Two years and five months later he realized the irony of this statement and laughed so hard that anyone within a hundred mile radius of the blast went deaf.

Saturday 10/11/2012, 17:03

Since this Ray is Chuck Norris i think is status should be
Power : "over 9000" xD
Damage: Instant kill
Ability: Roundhouse Kick: + 30 000 life
Bonus + 2 damage xDD

I use Ray in every deck (even in ELO- not really a surprise) because no one this to kill chuck norris