Yes it is me the unknown shadow i am making this just cuz i used to post a bunch of stories in another game (though they were sick and terrifying) you dont have to read this if you dont want to any ways this might not be the kind of fanfics you might be used to the main charactors are of my invention. they are only 2 charactors i made for this
eduardo: tall short black hair handsome,bronze, and muscular hopeing to go to clint city and join the ulu watu
drunn'kenn big beefy with long black hair and carries beer everywhere trying to join the fang
chapter 1 : bad beginnings
"i dont get it if clint city is so great then why is so many people leaving?said drunn kenn his long black hair going all the way down to the barrel on his back "they probbley didint join any clans and now there too scared to stay in town unlike us we know what clans we are gonna join" mutterd eduardo as they both ran towards tha city gates when they reached the gates they saw a huge bridge leading towards the city " we could probbly run through the bridge in minutes" well lets do it" and they ran foward towars the other side when they were around the center of the bridge that they saw a huge group of men with a huge man leading them dressed in red followed by a woman in red clothes running towards them
Babs Hartley beat me to the constructive critism. I definately see some improvement, but the lack of capitalizing letters and sentience structure still needs a lot of work. As for story itself you have a good start though Hawk's death felt really sudden.